Is Your Fighting Affecting Your Children?
Disagreements in a relationship are somewhat inevitable. With issues from finances to lifestyle choices there never seems to be a shortage of topics to disagree on. When children are a part of the family unit there are even more possible topics of contention made available to a bickering couple. Although arguments are a natural part of any relationship, there is a point where the fighting can prove to be toxic for the children in your home.
Children pick up on emotions displayed by their parents. If the parents are constantly fighting, therefore creating a hostile environment, the children will start to exhibit behaviours that stem from that behaviour. Children behave differently depending on each individual situation. Some children who live in a house where the parent’s frequently fight become anxious and unable to focus on the most basic tasks. Others will mirror the behaviour they witness and become angry or unstable in basic social situations. It is hard to determine how your children will be affected by your constant fighting, but be aware that they will most definitely suffer in some way.
This is true for people who fight on a regular basis. The occasional disagreement within a relationship is normal and is not cause for concern. It’s when fights occur on a daily basis with your children as witnesses that you will start to notice their behavioural changes. Pay close attention to how your children react when you fight. If they start to cry, run an hide or yell out of frustration or fear, then you have a problem on your hands.
Children also mimic your behaviour. So when they feel frustrated about something, instead of working through it in a civilized manner they will be more likely to react as they have seen their parents do so, by lashing out, yelling or even throwing things. These habits are all very difficult to break, especially if the parents are doing nothing to modify their behaviour from which the children are learning from.
It is incredibly important for you to keep your adult problems between adults. Do not burden your children with anything that is not their problem, but in fact a problem of your adult relationship. Save your disagreements for after the children go to bed, or better yet find a way to resolve your issues without a fight at all. Your children should always be a priority in your house and if they are being impacted by your fights, take the matter seriously and seek out the help you need in order to provide a stable and loving home that your children deserve.